I have three daughters. Four year old twins, and a just turned 6 year old. They are about 16 months apart. In fact, I was still breast feeding when I found out I was pregnant.
Grace was a great baby. I carried her to 36 weeks- which is amazing since the previous baby I delivered at 34 weeks. I was high risk because of placenta previa, and had an emergent c-section. So Grace, was a semi-normal delivery. I literally pushed her out in 8 pushes, not giving her time to clear lungs, buying her a week in NICU because of fluid on her lungs.
Grace was my dream baby. Slept, ate, and slept and ate. Hardly cried, was happy and fat.
She is a true mini me. For birthdays, she scours the house for items to wrap and give to us-which I totally did when I was young. She always wants to hug, and mother her little sisters. Sometimes she is a little bossy. I guess it comes with being the middle child.
Fast forward to today. This little incident that melted my heart. Only because it was a true life lesson for Grace.
We are at the family cottage. We stay above the garage in a loft, and walk over to the main house. We usually go during the summer months. However, this time the whole family came during spring break. Usually it is just a “boys” trip.
My husband hates it when I tell stories. He says I always get off topic. True. Very true. I apologize in advance.
So… when we stay at the loft, we walk over to the main house…
Grace and the girls wanted to head over to the main house, so I let them. Buying myself twenty minutes in bed is just a gift of love. Letting kids do things on their own gives them a bit of independence that they love.
When we arrived at the cottage late in the night, we carried one of the kids in, so two pair of boots, three girls. It was the twin’s boots, and Grace left hers in the car. She talked one of the twins in giving her their boots. Being the loving sister Hillary is, she gave her boots to her sister. Leaving her with nothing. So Hillary walked over to the cottage in bare feet. In the snow. Bare feet.
Granted, literally it was a 20 step walk, but…. wow. Granted, I should of supervised and made sure they had shoes on…but I was sleeping. Granted, I should of walked them over.. but I did not. I am not a helicopter mom. I believe in freedom, and independence. And many may disagree. Many of you are shaking your head as you read this.
(The loft. Picture taken from back of main house).
I grew up in a small town. I did everything on my own. Not because my mom wanted me to have freedom, but because my mom worked full time. She left me alone a lot. I discovered, I wandered, I did everything. I never played video games, or watched television. I was always outside, learning, and living life.
Nowadays… kids have harnesses. Moms are hovering over their children. Other moms get critisized when their take their eyes off their children for even one second. I can not go anywhere with my children and look at my phone. God forbid I look at my phone without being videotaped and rediculed on Facebook for not “interacting with my children”.
The day and the age of social media. Where many moms are so concerned about what other moms are doing. They are simply mean, degrading, judging, and downright an asshole. Again, I digress. They should be watching their children- but instead they are watching me! Shitty mom… lol
So, I pull Grace aside and tell her that she, as a big sister should of not let her little sister walk in the snow bare foot. That it was a potentially dangerous situation and that she should of told mom. That she is the big sister, and she needs to look out for her little sisters.
She truly felt bad. And that was not my intention because she did not put two and two together. I just wanted her for the future, to learn and use her thinking skills.
I gave her and hug and hopefully she will remember. Life lessons.